Careers at ANC4P
Your Value Is Your Resume
At ANC4P, we don't hire employees; we acquire human capital assets. We believe traditional employment is a relic of socialist thinking. Here, every role is a business venture, and every team member is a profit center. If you're a rational actor with a relentless drive for personal gain, you've found your home. Note: all positions require you to subscribe to our corporate Oxygen and Justice plans.
Unpaid Intern (Competitive Experience Market)
Location: Our Unventilated Basement Campus (Global)
A unique opportunity to pay for the privilege of observing greatness. Responsibilities include fetching coffee, polishing our gold-plated servers, and participating in non-consensual ethics experiments. The experience gained is a valuable asset you can add to your personal ledger. Note: A security deposit of 5 BTC is required to cover potential depreciation of company assets.
Requirements: 10+ years of experience in a similar role, must provide own laptop and Class-B survival gear. A net worth below $1M is an automatic disqualifier.
Chief Moral Flexibility Officer (CMFO)
Location: The Grey Zone
Are you an expert in finding the financial upside to ethical dilemmas? The CMFO is responsible for stress-testing the Non-Aggression Principle for profitable loopholes. You will lead a team of ex-lawyers and disgraced philosophers to craft bespoke ethical frameworks for our top clients, ensuring their actions are always justifiable within a purchased moral system. This role offers a generous bonus structure tied to the number of existential crises you can successfully monetize.
Requirements: PhD in philosophy (or equivalent experience in corporate lobbying), demonstrated ability to argue that black is white, and a complete absence of a conscience.
Director of Hostile Takeovers (Literal)
Location: Field-Based (Various Unregulated Territories)
This is a hands-on role for a results-oriented leader. The Director will manage our private security portfolio to facilitate "involuntary asset transfers" and "dynamic market entries." You will be responsible for strategic planning, logistics, and on-the-ground execution of corporate mergers where the primary negotiation tool is overwhelming force. Success is measured by territory acquired and rival infrastructure "decommissioned."
Requirements: 15+ years experience in private military contracting, international arms dealing, or managing a successful cartel. Must be comfortable with loud noises and morally ambiguous outcomes.
Lead Child Labor Coordinator
Location: Youth Productivity Solutions Division
Maximize the output of our most energetic and affordable asset class: children. The Coordinator will interface with our corporate partners to place children (ages 4-17) in fulfilling, productivity-enhancing roles. You will be responsible for managing work schedules (20/7 shifts), optimizing nutrition paste distribution, and gamifying production quotas with our proprietary "Ayn Rand's Fun Factory" app.
Requirements: Experience as a summer camp counselor or prison warden. Must be immune to the sound of crying. Ability to count very, very high.